Blessed by GOD, to be loud and proud of what is good and right and true! GOD bless us, Everyone! IJCNA

Saturday, June 27, 2009


I have never hated so much in my life as I hate now. I hate all involved in the taking of Joe. And I curse them all, to the pits of hell! So if you were involved in the taking of Joe and your life turns bad, remember my curse, that is what you get! I pray to GOD for HIS vengeance, as I cannot do as well as HE can. I also pray for forgiveness of my hate and anger and pray for GOD's justice, as 'VENGENCE IS MINE SAYETH THE LORD'!

CPS (CHILD PROTECTION SERVICES), has been called here 4 times. I think the worst thing about this system is any idiot can call and make up any reason to stir up trouble for the person they are mad at. The latest being a lesbian druggie named Kerstin. She not only does weed, but she also does cocaine, meth, crack, X, and anything else she can get her hands on, who is a lowdown gutter trash person, and yet, is able to call and lie just for her own selfish reasons.

But let me go back to the beginning, 1997. My x mother in law was dying of cancer and I spent most of the last week of her life at MD Anderson. I was there with my X. We were there when she died. I felt her go. It was a terrible time. While I was spending time there, I had one of my old friends from Jr High school that had been my friend for years and years, stay with my son and daughter. At one point she called me and told me that she had talked to my daughter and said my son had been molesting my daughter and made her bleed. I told her no way, I knew my son better than that. Then a couple days later, CPS calls me and tells me to get my son out of school and go to CPS office. I had no clue about all this but was eager to rectify things. Come to find out, my friend had been drunk and misunderstood what my little daughter had said. She was trying to say she fell on an angel wing costume wire and was cut, down there. But she was only 5 and my friend was drunk and had led her on with her questions. It was a big mix up, we spent 3 days at CPS, had my daughter physically examined and talked to, and my son also, over and over... only to come to the conclusion that it never happened. And they did get to the bottom of the fact that the incident happened at a friends when she fell on the wire and the mother of the friend put medicine on it. And that was that. After 3 days of interrogations we ended up with an apology and offers of counselling. Both my son and daughter said they just wanted to go home. So I told the CPS, "Thanks, but no thanks!" We just wanted to get back to our normal life.

The second time CPS was called out. It was 2002, right after my divorce in 2001. I didn't know until yesterday who had called. My X was trying to get back in my life and I just wouldn't do it. CPS came out again and checked things out only to discover that the kids were all good. They were healthy and well taken care of. And I guess the worker could tell the accusations were not true. My daughter was 11 at that time and my son was living with his dad most of the time. All was well, case closed. Come to find out, yesterday... I was read the accusations from that time and I could tell by the info, that it was my X who had called. He said all manner of things, but the one thing that gave me the clue that it was him, was the fact that they were told that I got away with things because I was sleeping with a cop. Now with all due respect of policemen everywhere, whom I dearly love and admire and would love to have a man who was a cop, I have in fact never slept with one. But the man I was seeing at that time had told my X that he was a cop so my X would leave us alone. Also, my X had called me back then, saying my daughter was flashing people on the street, I had told him it wasn't her, she was in the house. But he was drunk and got radical with me. So now today, I have anger towards him, now that I know he made that call.

The 3rd time CPS was called was during IKE. We had no power for 8 days. The doors and windows were all open. Joe (my grandson) was almost 2. He was playing by the back door,when I noticed he wasn't there. I hollered at my daughter and I started towards the back, and then a knock came on the front door, a neighbor was out working on their yard and had brought him to the front door. Not even a minute had gone by. We went outside and discovered that he had learned how to open the gate, I immediately put a lock on it. The next couple days, we had just gotten the power back on and I had started to clean up inside and there came a knock on the door. It was CPS. What about the gate? Well, look, I put a lock on it. While they were doing paper work. The man who was with the woman noticed a gas mask on the table. I hadn't even noticed it. It belonged to my son and was something he had bought at a shop down the street. The man said it was a crack pipe. I told him, "No way, my son may be a pot smoker but not crack. And I figured that he was a good kid, had never been in trouble and if that was all he was doing, well then I was lucky." "NO," the man insisted... it was a crack pipe. I examined it and only found green leafy residue in it and showed it to them. But they still insisted. In fact, my son went to take a urine test to prove it was just marijuana, which it was. His wife, she tested clean. They had to do the parenting classes and that was it. In the meantime, my son had gotten a promotion at work and had quit smoking. And to this day he does not smoke anymore. But he has since started drinking alcohol. Which, personally I would rather him just smoke the pot. But he says if he cant smoke, then he will be like the others who are allowed to drink and get drunk cause alcohol is legal. Which in my opinion, I have done both and I feel the weed is the least of the problems. Well, it was resolved and things got back to normal.

Then this year, March the 3rd. A knock came on the door. I opened it to see another CPS worker. A woman, investigating a report that I was smoking weed, crack, doing cocaine, meth and X and other drugs I cant remember, and so was my daughter and that we were letting my grandson do it too. I laughed cause it was so absurd. I told her that I have been a pot smoker since 1971... it was saturated in my fat cells. She thanked me for being honest and asked me to submit to a drug test to eliminate the other drugs. I thought sure thing, I knew that there is lots of legislation in action trying to recategorize the weed that grows from a seed from a drug to something less troubling. And in Texas it's a misdemeanor to have a little. After all, how can there be a law against something that grows from a seed in the ground?? A few years ago, I found myself smoking pot with a U.S Marshall. And I asked him why it was illegal. He told me. I can tell the story but that will be for a different day. For today, I want to stick with the issue that has caused me to hate. So I go for their drug test to prove that I wasn't doing all those other drugs. Of course it was positive for the weed, but nothing else.

They also said I was selling drugs here cause of lots of people coming and going. HA! I have lived in this neighborhood for over 40 years, went to all the schools here and know many many people, plus my kids have lots of friends too. I am a people person and have lots of friends who stop by. And many times, if it was for the kids and they wern't here, it was normal for them to come to the door and then leave. I told them all this. If they set someone out to watch my house, they would get very bored. WHY? Because these are all lies.

We had discovered that the person who called in to CPS was the new girlfriend of the X girlfriend of a neighbor. She was a trouble maker so I never allowed her in my house, even tho I allowed her girlfriend and the X in. So she got mad and made that call. Not only did she call and tell lies on us, she also called another friends work and told them she was stealing money from them, which got the girl fired. And she also called on another friend who had 4 kids. So it was a revenge type thing for her. I was so angry that this lesbian druggie who did all those drugs herself, could call in and say lies that have my life destroyed at this point in time. I only wish that CPS would have a law in effect that the person making the call would have to submit to a drug test/criminal history first. Because if that was the case, this woman would of failed with all of the drugs she had said we did. In actuality, she was the one who did them. How can it be that any drunk or druggie can call in and lie about things and not get punished? I am positive if they would drug test the callers and do a back ground check on them first, it would eliminate many a case for the CPS to have to work on.

Michelle Obama said a few months ago, for the first time she was proud of her country, well I have to say today, for the first time I am ashamed of mine. Man made laws and words that are twisted and misconstrued and left to tell a false truth. (false truth being when a person pretends they are telling the truth but in reality is telling a lie).

They wernt going to drug test my daughter because she was a minor. But asked me to have her drug tested to rule out the other drugs. Knowing this... I was happy to show she wasn't doing all the drugs, I paid for her to go to the DR and get the test done and had the results faxed to this worker. I took her at her word, that it was to eliminate other drugs and figured it would mean some sort of classes for her. Almost 4 months had passed and yesterday, the worker came back to my door, told us she was taking Joe. WHAT? Cause THC in the Urine? I thought it was to eliminate other drugs and maybe have to take some classes. But NO, because of the CPS history. So they are judging me for my past history which was all unfounded except for the escape from the unlocked gate. YES, Joe was taken away from a good home where he was loved and cared for, being healthy in mind and body, no abuse no neglect. Simply because the papaerwork says so. It baffles me how this has come to this end. Yes, the fact remains, a child was taken away from a good loving home, just because some people can get mad and call in with lies.

Why do I smoke? I have had trouble with anxiety for almost 35 years. My family DR whom I have seen since I was 11, tried many medications, among them Valium and Xanax, Buspar and others. They all put me in the bed and I couldn't do things around the house, or watch the kids. I knew that the weed from a seed was helpful for me, it helped in calming down my racing anxiety without hindering me from doing the things I needed to do. I am NOT some loser who sits around smoking pot all day doing nothing. I am one who gets up and does the responsible daily routine and then goes into my private bathroom when I feel the need and takes a couple small tokes to relax a little. Or, socially it is a good thing to do. Like the American Indians have their peace pipe. I felt all peaceful.

I have never been in trouble with the law. I have been a Foster mother, a step mother, had about 15 children pass through my home. My sisters friend, Lisa never knew her mother and when at 14 they found out her dad was dying of brain cancer, she came to live with us and stayed until she got married at 17. I loved Lisa very much, just as I loved all the kids. Now I am down to the last child, my baby will be 18 in 100 days. I have lots of love to give to these kids, including my precious grandson. But yet, I am cast out as a potential caretaker simply because in this 'close to communist state', I am judged by my urine and not my character. Sorta reminds me of the time a man was judged by the color of his skin. I don't care what the gossipers say... I don't care that they are jealous cause I don't let them in my home.

I am a good mom, I was lucky enough to inherit money so I can be here with the kids. It wont last the rest of my life, but it is enough to get me through the kids being here at home. I am looking forward to getting a little non stress job, being on my own. Maybe even get myself a boyfriend which I have denied myself because I have had a daughter here with me. I will be happy being the writer, poet, singer/songwriter that I am. I have plans on finishing up a second home made CD and the writing projects I have going on. Along with the 3 completed works. I just pray it will all mean something someday.

Today, when we talked to Joe on the phone and he said he wanted to come home to mommy and Nanny, I broke down. He has only been gone a day. And they expect him to be away from his home and family for months? It is wrong. Based on lies. And the one who is suffering for it the most, is a little boy who just wants his mommy and Nanny. Altho, that can be debated by the tears that have poured from this Nannys eyes as they took her most favorite boy in the whole wide world away. Ripped away all of a sudden from the place where he was the safest and the most loved.

I am not one to go raging through the streets and killing people for the injustice that has been inflicted on us through lies and gossip of ignorant people who have their own agenda of revenge and hostility.

I just want our Joe to come back home.


Michael Bloomburg, 1942
Bob Marley, 1945
George Washington, 1732
Peter Fonda, 1939
Johnny Cash, 1932
Sharon Stone, 1958
Al Gore, 1948
Francis Ford Coppola, 1939
Thomas Jefferson, 1743
Conan O'Brien, 1963
Jack Nicolson, 1937
William Shakespeare, 1564
Willie Nelson, 1933
James Brown, 1933
Richard Feynman, 1918
Bob Dylan, 1941
John F Kennedy, 1917
Newt Gingrich, 1943
Juliette Lewis, 1973
Montel Williams, 1956
George W Bush, 1946
Cheech Marin, 1946
Robin Williams, 1951
Wesley Snipes, 1962
Sir Mick Jagger, 1943
Louis Armstrong, 1901
Robert Mitchum, 1917
Bill Clinton, 1946
Dave Chappelle, 1972
Lily Tomlin, 1939
Keanu Reeves, 1964
Bill Murray, 1950
Steven King, 1947
Sting, 1951
John Lennon, 1940
Paul Simon, 1941
Art Garfunkel, 1941
Ted Turner, 1938
Winston Churchill, 1874
Richard Pryor, 1940
Dionne Warwick, 1940
Brad Pitt, 1963
Jane Fonda, 1937
Saint Nicholas