Struggle To The End

 I just walked through my quiet home, and I realized I had the same happy peaceful feeling I felt with my barbie house back in the 60's. GOD reminded me that we should have our own house in order before we try to organize other homes. And that is spiritual info referring to the spirit.

It's been a real struggle here. I have 2 disabled people in my house I take care of. And I have been taking care of Dee's brother not being paid for, but he was alone. Thank GOD I had an old friend of 29 years call me asking to come stay with me to get away from a horrible situation. I thought of Dee's brother, and she was so happy to hear there was a room available. And she had already taken care of her mother her aunt and her brother who have all passed now. So, she knows how to take care of a person who is on hospice. GOD has shown a hand in this arrangement everywhere! It was amazing to see GOD making things happen so smoothly, specifically getting a new mattress, which is a whole story in itself, so I will save that for another time. And getting this woman to the eye Dr to take care of her cataracts. Another thing I will save for another day. Because this blog is about GOD working within my heart.

I was also helping my neighbor who is paralyzed, she got into a car accident when she was 30. Shes 70 now, I usually see her riding the neighborhood in her wheelchair, I've known her for about 30 years now, well she is in a situation where she had lost her home health person, so I was going over there and making sure she took her medicine and helped her eat a little bit and let the dogs in and out. This was a blessing for me... She has her sister and grand daughter and her mother lives 2 houses down, but I was asked to do this at 9am and immediately said yes. I love her, she is my sister in Christ, and it was a blessing for me to be able to help when needed. 

And another friend showed up at my door, she had escaped out of her bathroom window running from the mental health people, she had attacked her husband and bit his nose, it will leave a scar. But I didn't get that info until later on. So, she asked me to take her to her dads. An hour's drive, she said she would give us gas money when we got there. (That wouldn't matter if I was rich, but I live poverty level according to my taxes.) When we got there, no one had any money and dad's card was at an aunt's house and it was too late to get it, said she would bring me money the next day, next day comes and she said her daughter said her grandson needed his Mimi, so again put off, heard nothing since. 

I'm OK today but for that night I was angry and said some things that I didn't mean. And GOD immediately showed me why and where I was wrong. 

I give my bad issues to GOD because HE knows how to help me to do better. Speaking things like that wasn't something I usually do. But I do think things that I have to give to GOD. It's because when it comes to the spirit it's both good and evil that is present. You either pass it over or pick it up. Learning and growing is to learn which is which. You really need to know so you can give the right thing to GOD. Or the wrong thing, whichever way your point of view. Because we give both good and bad to GOD... and GOD sorts it all out. This helps my peace. I am not haunted, and I can see clearly.

Things have settled down. My neighbor... she has her home health person back and Dee's brother has Ms. B, and they are well. And I am able to come in here and talk about my feelings. 

I was strained. I was on the edge. At the end of the day, I didn't have the energy or mind frame to take care of me. Or come in here and talk about certain things. Have you ever gone 5 days without a shower? Well, it's not pretty. 

I was pushed, I was needed. 

And GOD somehow pushed and pulled me through it. 

When I couldn't do more, GOD gave me rest. I think I slept 10 or 11 hours for 2 days! Did I tell you I had a dream I was fighting a war, and, in my heart, I knew that any second the enemy could come around the corner and kill me, but I kept going. Kept doing what I was supposed to do to help. 

And I made it!

I know life is a 'this and that' learning experience. 

I am grateful to have the Holy Ghost, the Spirit of GOD within to help me in all ways, always.

Many people in the world are suffering ill thoughts... I will say, call on Jesus, Jesus is the link to GOD. Do a web search, download a bible app. Learn about the man who walked this earth and taught us a better way! Pray without ceasing...

I am so happy to see the spirit swelling in the land. 

I am happy to be alive and able to serve GOD as HE serves me!

Praise GOD, Thank U Jesus!

GOD Bless US, Everyone! IJCNA